Former monk speaks of journey of faith as a transgender woman
Sabine Estner in an interview with the Viennese church newspaper "Der Sonntag": Transgender identity "not a lifestyle, but an existential journey" - "Don't just talk about transgender people - talk to us. Many judge without ever having a conversation."
Sabine Estner, once a monk in a Catholic monastery, advocates for a more nuanced understanding of transgender identity in the church. In an interview in the current issue of the Viennese church newspaper "Der Sonntag" (June 15, 24/2025), the 56-year-old engineer speaks of her years of inner struggle, profound crises of faith, and her current spiritual home in the Roman Catholic Church. She also describes her journey as a transgender woman in her recently published autobiography, "I Am How God Created Me." With this publication, she wants to demonstrate that transgender identity is "not a lifestyle, but an existential path": "You don't choose transgender identity."
"Don't just talk about transgender people - talk to us. Many judge without ever having had a conversation," Estner urges. Transgender identity is not something you choose, but rather "a deep inner knowing - and a path you take not because you want to, but because you have to in order to survive."
Even as a child, she felt like a girl, but it wasn't until 2017 that she made the decision: "either I live as a woman - or not at all," Estner said in an interview. Before that, she had undergone exorcisms in a charismatic environment, among other things - "and then a complete breakdown." Only after a complete psychological and physical collapse, which resulted in the loss of her health, job, home, and relationship, did she find the courage to come out. Today, she lives on disability benefits with chronic fatigue syndrome, but remains active in her Catholic parish, a queer worship group in Munich, and a Bible study group.
Estner described her faith in Jesus as a vital element. The Bible also gives her comfort, especially passages like "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened" or Jesus' words about people who are different "from birth" from the Gospel of Matthew (Matthew 19:12).
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